The 4,000 Year Wedding
by Alpha-Leopard-Seal
Summary: (CHAPTER 4 IS UP!) After 4,000 years of preparation, the God of Destruction finally pops the question. What could go wrong? Chaos/Tikal. M for Language and other mature content.
1. Will you marry me?

The 4,000+ Wedding

A/N: I don't own Chaos or Tikal, SEGA does.

Chapter 1.

The Proposal

The story starts with Chaos and Tikal walking along a beach on Angel Island at sundown. Chaos and Tikal had just gotten back from their day at Station Square. The two had lunch, watched a movie, did some shopping and even went on some rides at an amusement park. Having saved money by not taking part in any of the recent Sonic abominations (i.e. Sonic 06), Chaos was able to pull this whole day off. But the former God of Destruction had one last thing to show Tikal.

As the two strolled on the beach, Chaos took note of Tikal:

Tikal the echidna was magnificent. She was wearing her tribal clothing that showed her wonderful figure, a golden headdress that held her fragrant quills in place, and her purple, loving iris'. If eyes are the window of the soul, Tikal's would show a person of great faith, love and understanding. Despite the would-be suitors, OCs, and even crazy furry stalking fanboys, Tikal chose Chaos as her lover because while others saw a monster, she saw a misunderstood, lost person who was not only strong, but caring and devoted as well.

The two lovers stop walking and gaze at the sun setting in the distance.

"Tikal." Said Chaos.

"Yes Chaos?" Asked Tikal.

"I want to thank you."

"For what?"

"Everything. From accepting me when others turned away, to showing me things like love and understanding. But what I cherish most is having you as the love of my life(gets on one knee and pulls out a little black box. Tikal is fighting back tears of joy and happiness) Tikal, (opens box revealing a fine cut Diamond ring) will you marry me?"

No longer able to contain her joy, Tikal responded with an overjoyed "YES!"

Chaos hands the ring to Tikal.

"Oh Chaos it absolutely mag(tries putting it on) Uh Chaos?"

"Yes my love?"

"It doesn't fit."

"Yes and...wait what doesn't fit?"

"The ring."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm positive, look."(Tikal shows the ring not going past the first digit on her finger.)

For a very brief moment, Chaos' expression went blank. Everything he planned today went w/ out a hitch. And now, the grand finale was ruined, or was it?

"Look Chaos we still had an awesome day and this isn't a deal breaker or anything. But who sold you the ring?"

Just then, Chaos remembered who sold him the ring, Davis.

"Chaos?"

(Pulls out Train pass) "Let's get your ring."


	2. Refund

A/N: Hey everyone sorry for not updating this story for a while. I just started my summer break and am moving the story forward. Last time, Davis ripped Chaos and Tikal off, now they have a score to settle.

Chapter 2.

Refund.

Setting: Jewel store.

The scene starts w/ Davis eyeing the clock, waiting for it to strike 9 pm (which was still a good 15 minutes away.

"Come on, please say 9..."

Just then the front door opened.

"Hey look were closing soo... (Sees Chaos and Tikal) uh hey guys uh...(backs up to rear door)

Before Davis can reach it, Chaos extends his arm and blocks the door.

"Hey what is it?" Asked a frightened Davis.

"Show him Tikal." Said Chaos.

Tikal walks up to Davis and hands him the ring.

"You ruined Chaos' proposal to me by giving him a small ring."

"I'm sorry, I'm under a lot of pressure: the Sonic franchise is in the shitter, the past few games were terrible and now I'm working here.

"Don't make it right." Replied Chaos.

"I don't want any trouble, this store is run by the Russian mob. If I mess this one up, the boss will kick my sorry ass all the way to Bangkok no questions asked! We all make mistakes look, (empties register) here's your money back."

"There's one more thing." Said Chaos.

"What's that?" Asked Davis.

"We get to pick some rings for free." Said Chaos

"Wait you can't do that, you have to buy ..." Replied Davis.

"Actually it's legit. Hey Tikal." Said Chaos.

Tikal then pulls up a brochure for the jewelry store.

(Reads) "Ivan's Jewelry store strives to meet the satisfaction and expectations of its employees, staff, and customers. If for any reason we get an order wrong, the customer will not only get their money back, but also a chance to pick the ring(s) (limit to 2) of their choice for FREE. All rights reserved." (Stops reading)

With that the two lovers pick their desired rings, which happen to be the most expensive one in the whole store.

"Wait those rings are worth a fortune!" said Davis.

"That's why we're getting them." Replied Chaos.

"Unless we have to drop by Ivan's joint later for a little chat." Added Tikal.

"NO! UH THAT WON'T BE NESSISARY! (Gets the rings and puts them in boxes) Would you like a bag?"

"Nope, we're good, thanks though." Said Tikal.

And with that the two left.

(Back at Angel Island)

"Tikal, (gets on one knee) will you marry me?" Said Chaos.

"Why Chaos… OF COURSE I WILL!" Replied Tikal.

And with that, the two lovers embraced.

(Ivan's Jewelry store)

A few minutes later, a fancy Soviet-era limo pulls up in front of the Jewelry store. In walks a huge Russian gangster named Ivan w/ several ex-SPETSNAZ bodyguards.

"Davis, you have those special rings no?" Asked Ivan.

"Uhhh…funny story boss…" Replied Davis, while fighting the urge not to wet himself.

A/N: So glad I'm not Davis now. Anyway I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and soon we will see Chaos and Tikal plan their wedding!


	3. News

A/N: Here's chapter 3.

Chapter 3.

You can't say that.

*The news reporter is based off of this actual reporter jerk named "Bill" who has a knack for being rude and arrogant.*

watch?v=o7njqLWbHQQ

Anyway onto the story.

Back at Angel Island at 8.00 a.m. a week later.

Chaos and Tikal are having breakfast while watching the news.

*BREAKING NEWS*

"And after a week of searching, the body of Davis has been found flayed and mutilated inside the basement of a gay brothel in Bangkok. Authorities are still looking into the motive for the crime and are asking people for their thoughts on the issue." Announced Bill the reporter.

"He was OK, I mean he wasn't the greatest or anything but still OK." Said Sonic.

"To be honest, he caused more problems than solutions." Added Tails.

"Davis was mean." Said Big.

"And that concludes…"

"HEY WAIT! FROGGY WANTS TO SAY SOMETHING!"

"Oh uh okay. (Holds mic to Froggy) So uh… what are your thoughts on Davis?"(To himself) "I can't believe I'm doing this." Thought Bill.

Big lowers his head to Froggy's.

"RIBBIT, RIBBIT." Said Froggy.

"So what is he saying?" Asked the Reporter.

(To Froggy)"Ok, I'll tell him." (To Reporter) "Froggy said": "Who is Davis?"

The reporter falls down anime style w/ a sweat drop above his head.

"Well Froggy Davis was dat kid who…"

(Cuts Big the Cat off) "And that concludes our interviews and…"

"Uh Mr. Reporter?"

"Look I don't have time for you or your crazy antics, so why don't you and your ret(bleep)ed f(bleep)ing frog make like Forrest Gump and go back to chao kindergarten and flunk!"

"Uh Bill we're still rolling." Said Frank the Camera guy.

"Say what?" Asked Bill.

"UGH people can be sooo RUUUDE!" Said Big as he and Froggy left. At that point people were starting to give Ted the reporter mean looks.

Angry mob w/ torches and pitchforks forms around the lone reporter. 

"Uhhh… back to you Sam!"

(Technical Difficulty screen pops up)

*News ends*

"That was HORRIBLE! THAT REPORTER OWES EVERYONE AN APPOLOGY CHAOS!"

Silence. Chaos is gone.

"Chaos?"

Tikal finds a note on the ground telling her to turn the news back on, which she does.

*News*

"I'M SORRY PLEASE I'LL DO ANYTHING PLEASE SORRY SORRY SOOOOOORRRRRYYYYY!" Screamed Bill as he fled from an angry mob led By Chaos and an army of chao.

"LIKE YOU MEAN IT!" Ordered Chaos.

(Back on Angel Island) "Oh Chaos." Gestured Tikal.

A/N: So yeah, this chapter may not have much to do w/ the story but I thought it would make for a good gag. The next chapter will focus on Chaos and Tikal looking for a Wedding dress.


	4. Dress Hunt

A/N: This chapter took me longer to work on than the others but is actually getting back on track.

Chapter 4

Dress hunting

(Chaos and Tikal walk into Silver's Wedding Dress store)

"(Using the worst excuse of a French accent in a poor attempt to sound more authentic and professional) Why Hello and welcome to my Wedding Dress store!(to Chaos seductively) We also fit MEN'S CLOTHING."

"We're just looking for a dress." Replied Chaos, completely unaffected by Silver's advances.

"Very well… so what dress are you looking for?" asked Silver.

(Freeze Frame)

A/N: Now granted, Chaos knew a lot of things; he knew Tikal's limits, as well as her ups and downs. He also knew that she loved Chaos and that he loved her back. But there were 2 **CRUCIAL** things he didn't know about Tikal; **1.** Despite Tikal's peaceful and loving nature, being in a wedding dress store awoken something inside her that had been dormant longer than the time the two lovers spent inside the Master Emerald. A feeling of determination to get the right dress come Hell or High water. **2.** She was about to respond w/ the same answer she gives Chaos whenever they try to decide what to eat for dinner.

(Frame resumes)

"Uhh… not sure." Replied Tikal.

To make matters worse, Chaos never saw "Say Yes to the Dress" and had no idea how long the process of finding a dress would take.

"Well we have the largest selection in all of Mobious!" Announced Silver.

"Awesome!" Replied Tikal.

"Orah!" said Chaos. (Hiding the fact that he was going to cancel several things today to make up for the time dress shopping was going to take.)

The first hour seemed like an eternity. Tikal changed dresses faster than Sonic changed voice actors. Some dresses looked to glamorous and some looked too slutty.

"How about this one madam?" Suggested Silver as he handed the dress to Tikal.

Tikal changes and returns wearing the dress.

"It a lovely dress…" paused Tikal.

"PLEASE SAY YES PLEASE SAY YES PLEASE SAY YES!" Thought Chaos.

"But it kinda makes my ass look too big." Answered Tikal.

"(Defeated) Well thank God I'm a titty man and not an ass man." Chaos thought to himself.

The hours dragged on and the bad dresses kept piling up. This dress wasn't for prom or a Birthday party; it was to be Tikal's Wedding dress. Chaos didn't know what to do. He had no idea how much longer he could take Tikal's untapped, Hell-bent determination to find the right dress, the long process, or Silver's ill fated homosexual advances towards Chaos.

Now Chaos was not homophobic or anything, but he just was not interested in Silver, he was interested in Tikal. And Silver's poorly done French accent didn't help either. For starters, he didn't say the word "super" like other people would. Rather, Silver would add a somewhat gay lisp whenever he said something. Now for someone who wasn't gay to talk like that, it would be deemed offensive. But in Silvers case it was acceptable (even though Chaos and Tikal knew a few villagers from the past who although were gay, had no gay lisp).

The other problem was the accent. One doesn't need to be of French decent to have an accent. But the way Silver uses it; one would think that Silver is acting like _THE ROOM _director Tommy Wiseau.

Right as Chaos was about to roar at Silver telling him to "Fuck himself with the Eiffel Tower", a beautiful voice bearing great news brought light.

"I FOUND IT!" Proclaimed Tikal.

As Chaos turned around, he gazed at Tikal. The dress she had picked looked like a regular dress but also had markings and symbols reminiscent of her tribe. Plus it managed to show a decent amount of cleavage, which was a personal score for Chaos.

"IT'S ABSOLUTELY MAGNIFICENT!" said Chaos as the soon to be husband and bride kissed.

"We'll take it." Said Tikal.

"Sure thing madam!" Said Silver as he went to make preparations for getting the dress sent.

After paying for the dress (which in Chaos's case, took all the money he was saving for a new weed lab in Jamaica but was to overjoyed with Tikal and her dress to feel bad) and changing back to her street clothes, Tikal and Chaos begin to head out.

"The dress has been shipped! Your family will love it!" Announced Silver.

Tikal stops walking.

"Tikal what is it?" Asked a concerned Chaos.

"Family…" was all Tikal said.

For a brief moment, the God of Destruction had no idea what she was talking about, but right as he caught on, Tikal had already buried her face into Chaos' chest and cried uncontrollably. Between sobs she would take quick breaths and saying, "I COULD HAVE DONE SOMETHING!" before sobbing again.

"Tikal it wasn't your fault!" replied Chaos as he comforted his crying bride.

"Father…" Tikal spoke remembering Pachacmac.

"Forget him, he has no power over you." Replied Chaos.

As the God of Destruction held Tikal, Silver couldn't help but notice the crying couple. Being the cheap ass opportunist he was (look no further than Sonic 06), Silver thought that the two were having issues and that could lead to a break up making Chaos single.

As Silver was about to make a very bad French pun, he heard o voice in his head, and is sounded like Chaos.

Having spent 4,000 years w/ Tikal, Chaos was able to learn a few prayers from Tikal. Now Chaos doesn't use these prayers that much due to the amount of energy they take up, but had enough in the tank to give Silver a short but firm telekinetic warning.

(To Silver telekinetically) "Listen and listen good: Tikal and I are getting married. If you so what as even try to hit on me again, I WILL PERSONALLY DRAG YOU TO PARIS, AND SHOVE THE EIFEL TOWER SO FAR UP YOUR ASSHOLE THAT THE TIP WITH THE FRENCH FLAG WILL BE WAVING OUT YOUR MOUTH FOR FRANCE AND THE WHOLE WORLD TO SEE!"

"Okay." Thought Silver as he ran to his personal bathroom to cry his eyes out.

"Chaos?" Asked Tikal as she wondered about Silver running to his bathroom crying.

"Don't worry about him, I will always be here for you." Said Chaos as he gently kissed her.

"Chaos…"

"Don't worry Tikal, lets head home"

And with that, the lovers went home to recuperate.

A/N: Silver is an asshole. So what set Tikal off? Chapter 5 will explain everything.


End file.
